eric booth – Unfundamentalist

This guest post is by Eric Booth.

Life was so simple before i died
i was the center, i reasoned, i lied
the world was all mine; it’s all about me
don’t like it? too bad; i’m blind you see

i worked real hard at leavin’ my mark
just step on friends whenever i want
cut corners an’ cheat to make ends meet
my inside’s a mess; my outside’s so neat

life was so simple before i died
when things get tough, i’d go hide

people could learn a lot from me
arrogant an’ smug like me they should be
always lookin’ out for ol’ number one
controlin’ it all an’ gettin’ it done

life was so simple before i died
each time i get caught, i just lied
one selfish world steeped in sin
an’ i was the best; determined to win

so selfish an’ mean like everyone else
i ran from the truth to distance myself
old navy, gap, abercrombie & fitch
dad’s skipped town and mom’s a bitch

life was so simple before i died
watch tv while the whole world cried

acid an’ pot; extasy an’ coke;
what did it matter? life’s a big joke;
turn up the music; drown out the pain
my world was so perfectly lost insane

i’ve gotta lose weight; i’ve gotta have more
locked in my cell i stare at the door
no one would take me; no one would care;
when they might notice, its only to stare

mom doesn’t hear me; dad’s never here
party some more; hide all the tears
sex was the answer; the question was dumb.
just tryin’ to feel; i settled for numb

raised in the dark; longing for light
scared an’ confused; too tired to… [Read more…] about Life was so simple before I died

You know how
sometimes people
in our lives
with whom we’re not terribly close,
(which includes nearly everyone)
like work colleagues for instance,
will, quite inadvertently, say or do something
that must obviously be a personal trigger
instantly teleporting you back across time and space
into that room you’ve been running from
and trapped in your whole life
and your anxiety level skyrockets
but unfortunately and thankfully,
you’ve developed
the keen survivalist talent of hiding your fears
so well the trigger-happy,
soon-to-be ex-colleague/friend,
blissfully and unknowingly continues
dancing with stilettos on your heart,
believing you to be interested
because you are, actually, looking right at them
while looking right past them
while the psychologically bound Pavlovian dog
part of your psyche forever unfairly associates
the person’s face, voice, and scent
with that room
and everything in it you want
to keep getting away from
but the meeting isn’t nearly over,
the problem isn’t nearly solved,
the delivery to the client is looming,
and you catch not nearly enough words
to further any of these noble petty
causes, delaying escape
and lengthening exposure
radiating from otherwise good, rational people
who have their own damn shit and
with whom you have no desire to share any of this
so these people become rather impatient with you
for not hearing them,
causing the inevitable second wave
comprising the winning package of
guilt and shame and self-flagellation
because you fear it’s… [Read more…] about You know how sometimes